I am 41 yrs old and have finally accepted myself as gay. I have not been an active member of the gay culture/community. I am very nervous about dating and going to bars and what not. I would really enjoy some intimacy that lasts more than 30 minutes. How should I go about making myself available? Is there anyone who has faced this same experience? I am straight acting and masculine. Do I just jump right in?
I Am Interested In Dating Gay Men And Need Some Advice?
Previous post: Online Dating Sites Review
Next post: What Do You Think Of Online Dating Sites Like Match And Eharmony?
{ 6 comments… read them below or add one }
Go to some gay pride places, Meet some other gay people, meet men through other men, & everything will be fine, You will find someone to love you for yourself.
go to any gay bar and try to meet a guy you are looking for some guys act like women and others act masculine just decide who you want to be. with choosing a partner when your gay you have the same array of descions as when your straight
If you are straight acting, then be straight.
awww that’s cute….. even though it took you 41 years to finally except a simple truth. It’s still cute nevertheless
yea…just jump
I would do a lot of things.
1) Go to a few gay bars and just chill out there. Find out which nights are active and which are slow. Either ask the bartender or maybe someone at the bar will be good enough to fill you in. Ask about gay events in your community. Bars are a good way to meet people but they should not be your only way. Many gays don’t go out often and some people don’t like the culture. But I would at least know where they are and what they are like and become familiar with them.
2) Pick up gay literature and read through it. At a gay bar or a gay friendly coffee house or laundry mat or video store or what ever – there are usually gay publications. Most are free and filled with advertisements. But you can learn what events might be going on. Is there a gay film festival some time during the year? A gay chorus? Is there a gay lesbian community center near you? If there is not one near you – is there one with in a few hours? What gay non profits are in your area? Are there any gay friendly churches in your area – or is there an MCC (metropolitan community church – a church that started 40 years ago in the US with a focus on the glbt community).
3) Hang out at a gay friendly coffee house once in a while.
4) Try a few adds in craigslist.
I have advised you to find out about gay chorus’s, non profits, film festivals and community centers for a good reason. These are gay events outside of the sphere of the bar scene. Volunteer for a gay charity once in a while. Make the effort to attend a social or two at a gay community center if you are lucky enough to have one in your area.
Don’t just rely on bars, but incorporate them.